KuKuJian.com

Dear Spussy,

U gave me my largest orgasm i had in my life, by kicking chelsea’s ass big time. It’s been years of pure undoubted loyalty towards u and u finally gave me a lick of satisfaction. When u were doing it during the extra time, the 3rd to the 33th minute was the most horrifying minutes of my time with u, but it was worthwhile peeing on my pants. I could wash it up but for u to lift a trophy finally, it’s a feeling tat will be stamped on my lungs forever.

The winner was not a stroke of luck, there were so many more chances tat could easily be counted. But the orgasmistic face of our buddy Jenas when the goal was scored, priceless.

And then when u ejaculate all over our gaffer, it was such great climax - he was soaking wet, from so many different guys.

I knew u will never let me down even though u were down 1 before halftime. The spirit was just great and i was thinking just for a split second, even though u can’t win it i’ll be proud of ur enduring performance. U made me high, and i just cant stop smiling. Job well done, and i truly congratulate u, and my love for u has definitely increased..

Yours sincerely,
Spurry

ps: Seeing Drogba’s theatricals act was a real damn shame. It was just a disgrace, wonder whether he will feel embarrassed watching himself doing all those. Just hope tat he’s not in the Premier League destroying the joy and genuineness of the beautiful game.

Pictures courtesy of www.spurs.co.uk

Sex scandal in Asia is different, and this is saddening. An Edison Chen in Hollywood will never have to bear such embarrassment and consequences. I feel for him, he’s cute and cool, and have super sexy twisted lips.

Attitude, he’s full of it even when he makes his public apology..

Sincere apologies to the gals tat he slept with, and their families. Heard tat 1 of those in the pic are about to get married and was called off due to this photo leakage, as the soon to be mother-in-law just couldn’t accept her to be in their family.

Taking a break from Hong Kong entertainment industry, doesn’t affect me much but pls, respect one’s privacy.. else, it could be u next, but wait, u just ain’t anyone popular tat ppl would be interested in. But still, if u still need a reminder, go delete off ur disgusting pictures with the whore and slynna tat u slept with for the past 20 months.

It was St. Valentine’s few days ago, and was at the practice session. Lately, we have came to know a French guy, estimated around his 40’s in the class together with us. He’s a nice guy, frenly, nice to talk with, and dances pretty fine. Just 1 thing, he’s going after M, a 23 years old student.

Age doesn’t matter? Oh of course it doesn’t, if the gal likes him.

But apparently she is not attracted to him. It’s pretty obvious tat the French guy got attracted to her, going all after her and following her a bit, ever since they 1st danced together in the Salsa Fest. It’s clear to all of us around tat he’s chasing her.. And on Valentines, he gave her a big bunch of flowers, in it, a card, saying in Swedish - Thanks for everything. There were words said to her, which sounds something like this (loosely quoted):

I’m tired today, can’t sleep well.. because u are in my mind all night long..

It’s pretty sweet, BUT, she just don’t like him and tat age difference, just makes it even harder to swallow - wat is he thinking?? Wishing M all the best in shooing away this bee out of her hive. But well M, u are an attractive gal so this could be the few “experiences” out of the coming many many more future ones!

On another note, was at a Chinese Restaurant for the 1st time in Uppsala! And tried some commercial chinese food swedishenized, buffet style.. and got all blotted up with familiar food diffamiliarized.

The taste was better than i thought and wat more, practiced some Cantonese with the Hong Kongy waiter, too bad i dare not lash out some di* nei, chao ha*, and ciba*.. oh i so need to talk some ahpek hokcan-language to someone live.

And it snowed again, after losing hope to see anymore snow for the winter, this happened.. and made the whole place oh so peaceful.. amen..

I still haven’t give birth to my snowwoman.

Updated 18 Feb, o’ Frenchie also said to M, that:

Sweetie mushy ei? M in dilemma..

And finally, resisted the urge and temptation and checked out my 1st ever Salsa Fest.. A live band playing Salsa music and loads and it really is loadsa human beings doing it in front of them.

To be frank, it seems to be much more decent then some of the student nations pubs, discos, etc those sorts tat i’ve been to. Here, it’s really about dancing and having fun and moving asses, well at least tat’s how it seems to me.. And it’s really none of any one of our business to get to know the “after-party”.

It was something new, dancing and practicing in classes are totally different as compared to the actual moment. There ain’t as much spaces to move into, many many bumping and knocking around, just gotta focus on the partner and do watever it takes to please her, and of course myself too. But it was really like a jungle - altruism is rare and not existent. Everyone wants to please their partner.

Anyway, let divert our thought to something much more delicious.. been carving to have this in my mouth for since yest morning, and when thinking bout it, fantasying it in the taste buds, it’s almost like blood without oxygen - true suffocation. And this means i gotta get some flour. Another resistance gave in just like tat, after 6 months here, my 1st pack of flour.

And this is wat it turned out..

Some hot transformation and oh it turned into this..

When the tongue got hold of this, inter-sensory got turned super on and went wild and then internally infected and influenced each other and there’s some wet wet eye balls.. i, i .. almost almost got wet.. it’s the taste of home, the taste of pa’s. All these years i have never tried to cook this at home, cuz it’s always pa’s expertise and kinda took it for granted and just consume it and shit it out. Now.. aww..

and it went together with this as my personal ratty new year self indulgence, in the comfort of my lil’ room in Döbelnsgatan 2C.

Hope everyone had a sweet ratty new year with lotsa cute and fat ass rats hopping around tickling and nibbling ur toe nail with their razor blunt unbrushed teeth and long curling cold curly silver tail hugging all around ur ankle! Phew~!

And so yes it is another virginity gone, this time for spending my 1st Chinese New Year apart from Pa and Ma. Sigh, does feel a little awkward, and CNY is nothing biggie in Uppsala, not at all.. well at least i’ve gave up looking out for any rats..

And i’m pretty damn glad tat i’m in the “yellow skin category”, and could easily slip into any Chinese (here i do mean China Chinese) gatherings and activities, without being too suspicious at 1st, until i open my mount with the la, ler, lors.. tat’s the thing about being a Malaysian “banana”.

But again, blessed tat at least i’ve been thru years of chinese education, if not i wouldn’t be getting along tat much with Chinese ppl.. But again, it does get pretty tricky when it comes to slangs and intonations and damn pro words and phrases tat u just smile over it and if u know u won’t use it, just forget about learning it. But it really does comes in handy knowing a couple of idioms, such as 袖手膀胱 and 床前明月光，光键脱光光.

But wat the heck, at least i made some dumplings, well part of the wrapping team and burst-wrap-and-blame-it’s-others gang, and more importantly, had some pretty good food..

Frankly, the chicken wings were brilliant, thanks to the chef of the night, who got some kicks on his cute ass for using up 0.5 + 0.5 = 1 liter of cooking oil..

And those who were in the kitchen, always gets the 1st bites, well with the reasoning of “testing testing, tasting tasting”..

And then act surprise for being caught “ratty” handed..

But then seriously, having pig’s elbow during a ratty year?? Can’t imagine but oh boy how warm it felt in the mouth..

And how bout icing it off and welcoming the ratty new year with a ratty lil piece herself!

Happy Ratty New Year everyone~! May you year be blessed with more “tikus”y muscles for the guys, and tat the gals will learn to appreciate and smile more when they see rats, rather than just screaming and yelling and jumping onto chairs and piano with any closest sticks they can get hold of.

Talking about chicks, i saw this magazine cover from one of an online site back home, on the hottest topic in town at the moment. Can’t resist not grabbing it and flipping thru the pages..

Magazine cover courtesy of wjlivelife.

Ain’t the ostrich cute? oh but it’s the Ostrich man (OM) tat’s getting all the headlines.. so, grab a copy from any local news stand - it’s worth the moment.. or else, just have a look of his 5 minutes of fame..

To imitate this stunt, penis protection crucially recommended from the Ostrich man himself..

This will always make my day looking at it, for the rest of my life.. thanks Ostrich man for the joy and laughters..

ps: i was told, no animals were harmed during the production process..

ps2: but on long term psychological trauma to the bird, it could be devastating.. KuKuJian condemns such act on animal, but since it’s for the sake of joy and laughter and probably lengthens human lifespan, it is excusable.